CNMI Visitor Industry Saved by … Who?

by The Truth Reporter

Asked about his thoughts on the recent announcement of the Parole for Russian and Chinese visitors Fitial said, “I always knew they would be given parole. Half of our tourist from China are already on parole for drug smuggling, human traffiking or other charges they had in the past in their own country.” Press Secretary Reyes was quick to chime in with, “By parole he means ‘patrol’ and by drug smuggling he means ‘smuggling the dealing’ and by… oh hell. I give up!”

Basically, the Administration has always followed a set and precise plan. They have not waivered from implementing this plan. We need only look back at the Marianas Monument to see how great the plan works when executed properly and when all things are spun correctly. The Governor was adamantly opposed to the Monument and went on record to state he may bring a lawsuit against them if they tried. He fought hard against the Feds and when it appeared he would not win his battle at the eleventh hour he jump sides and became to flag bearer and poster child for the monument.

We see the similarities today with the China-Russia Visa Waiver. He has adamantly opposed Federalization and has stifled communication. He has not actively participated in dialogue with the Federal authorities and brought a lawsuit against them. He has actively criticized the Federal agencies in charge of implementation, calling them liars and imputing ill motives on their agencies.

But as of today, now that it is becoming very clear that his temper tantrum throwing is not going to get him anywhere he has once again implemented his solid plan of flip flopping and taking credit from where it is truly deserved.

Reyes said, “Fitial would like to remind the community that if it was not for all of his hard work and diplomacy we would not have been given this concession by the Federal Government. He worked tirelessly negotiating the terms of this parole status with all of the top Federal players. He lost sleep and drinking time writing out terms.”

When asked if he will now drop the lawsuit with the Federal Government Fitial responded with a firm, "Hell NO! How would I be able to transfer large sums of tax payer dollars out of the CNMI before my term is up if I did that?" He did state that he would consider dropping it once his declaration that Finance is in a State of EMERGENCY is released later this week and he takes over full control of all of the funds.

He says the delay in the declaration is due to his toss up on whether to declare just Finance an Emergency or go for the full gusto and declare the Island of Saipan under a State of Emergency. He has opted for keeping it simple for now and containing it to Finance.

As of today, a State of Emergency is in effect and has been issued by Fitial for the following areas:

  • CHC
  • CUC
  • DPS
  • DPL
  • CPA
  • DCCA
  • Woman's Affairs
  • Indigenous Affairs
  • Mayors Offices on all islands
  • The Island of Tinian
  • The Island of Rota
  • FDM
  • Island of MAUG
  • Commonwealth Dart Association
  • DFW
  • DEQ
  • The Governor's Office
  • Legislative Bureau
  • Manamko Center
  • All Public Schools (except SSH)
  • Marpi Landfill
  • Northern reef exposures
  • Chamber of Commerce
  • HANMI
  • BANMI
  • Farmers Co-Op
  • Fisherman's Association
  • All Road-Side Vendors (including BBQ huts)

We contacted DHS, OIA, all of the sitting US Senators and Congressmen for a comment on the lengthy and fruitful discussions they have had with Governor Fitial and we received the same exact response from all of them, “Who the hell is Governor Ben Fitial? Oh.. garment ..labor… errr.. .lawsuit… uhmm…[cough] Excuse me. Nope sorry don’t know him. Never talked to him.” They all requested that their names and official titles not be place within 1,000 feet of this news article.


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COMMUNITY SCENE: What's a Motto You?

by The Truth Reporter

Let It Be! Don't Stop Believing! No Surcharge! Experience - Hard Work - Solutions!

We decided to head out and about in the community and get peoples' take on the different catch phrases that each of the Gubernatorial Candidates are using:

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John Rommerartti: I don't much care for talk. That is all that these mottos are. Just talk. For example, what does "let it be" mean anyway? Let CHC be the way it is? Let Retirement Fund Be the way it is? Let crime be? I mean we have BEen for 4 years. I don't want it to BE anymore.

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Cathy Guarto: I don't even pay attention to the posters and boards. I have learned to block them out. Zoning needs to chop 'em all down.

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Fredrocko Camacho: My slogan is "NO B.S." These jokers are all BS.

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Charles Reyes Jr.: I really think the best motto is "Let It Be!" It really conveys the spirit of a true leader. A leader that can step back and honestly assess where the CNMI is today - a thriving and successful Commonwealth. The Motto "Let it BE!" tells the community of voters that if you elect Ben and Tim... I mean Eloy, it will BE business as usual and you can expect the same success you have experienced these past 4 years for many more years to come! I like to think of the BE to mean more than names. To me as a voter it means Beyond Eternity!




ADMINISTRATION UPSET AND WILL NOT MOVE ON

by The Truth Reporter


The current Administration is extremely upset at a carry over from the previous administration that he believes is responsible for this controversy.

“After looking into this Reyes incident more thoroughly it is clear now,” said Charles, “that a former Babauta appointee from the previous administration is responsible for everything.” Fitial is furious that his initial desk audit of political loyalist did not turn up this individual who is responsible for this current incident when he took office. “At that time I put in place my buddies in every department. Their mission was simple. Check all staff and remove anyone tied to any party other than the Covenant Green party. I was assured this had been done! I am appalled that one slipped through. Heads are going to roll.” He went on to say, “ after the Local DPS covert and surprise drug bust slated for Friday at 2:00pm he will assemble the one remaining department head and all acting department heads and find out who is responsible.”

Reporters have discovered that the person that is the focus of Fitial’s anger is one Joe Senpasdot. He apparently was put in charge of destroying public records and inadvertently forgot to burn all outstanding drug test results and inter department evaluations and communications. We contacted him for a response but he was unavailable at the time. His wife however is asking for the community's help. It appears he has been missing since this story broke 5 days ago.

Fitial asked that we include a quote from him in this article. “This is just another negative result of Federalization. Please, DEA do not bring charges against Pete Reyes. Like me, he is allergic to lawsuits. Let it BE!”


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